Right now, my future is in the
hands of my teachers who will be deciding my GCSE grades in summer. Truthfully
speaking, my teachers are not particularly fond of me, so I am sitting on my
past tests and mock exams as a lifeline. As I have quite a lot of time on my
hands, the current situation has got me thinking. From the past couple of weeks,
I have been deeply surfing through the internet, researching psychology. It
fascinates me how our own brain is the only organ that named itself. It
fascinates me how a system made up of nerves so complex yet so simple have been
programmed to ensure the survival of the human race. It fascinates me how even
with the smallest signs, psychology can determine what kind of person you are
after analysing how you react to different situations. Just by understanding
how we operate, can assist us in becoming an overall greater version of
ourselves as we know the reason why we tend to do things and master techniques
to overcome and control situations.
Here I am going to you can broaden your thinking to master control of your emotions and your thought processing.
Daily Life Emotional Roller-coaster
Anger
There are 3 types of anger which
shape how we can react to a situation: open, passive, and assertive.
Passive Aggression: This is when we don't accept,
we are angry because we don't like the confrontation. It is better to take a
stand and accept the situation so you can move on from it. Without this, it can
lead to procrastination and not acting directly to what is going on. This can
come from backgrounds and upbringings where a reaction to a certain situation
isn't accepted. This is exactly when we shouldn't bottle up the anger because
it will only explode the bottle. Give yourself time and you can even take out
the anger on an object. We sometimes even take it out on other people
unknowingly and this is where self-reflection is key in outlives.
Assertive Anger: This is when you are in
control of your anger, thinking before speaking. This is when you are open to
communicate and understand the situation. This can help with passive and open
anger.
Procrastination- Passive Aggression
Procrastination is a side effect of passive aggression. We mistake it
for laziness but its' not, it is an active decision we take. When we
don't attend to what we are feelings and disregard it, we reflect it. When we
ignore what's going on inside of us, we will ignore what is going on outside of
us. Procrastination leads us to avoid things and wasting hours. I am guilty of
this. Hours where I have wasted, I could have been productive and done my
homework or revise instead of free styling a test. This is where I gave myself
a nickname - clutch master- because somehow, I wouldn't fail my tests.
Speaking from personal experience, procrastination has led to
overestimate how much time I had or overestimate how motivated I will be in the
future or even underestimate how long certain activities will take to complete.
If you have these false signs of time, it is likely you have been
procrastinating. We all have at, but the real question is how often do we do
it?
Recently, I have been improving. I have no choice, especially during
online school where it feels like an option so I must maintain focus. I follow
some basic steps that has helped me:
1) Recognise that you are Procrastinating- once we acknowledge it, then
that's how we can progress
2)Minimise distractions- so I can remain focus all the way through
3) Mini reward after completing task-so I can stay motivated.
Sadness linking to depression
We are on the next phase of the
roller-coaster and every day I say to myself how do I deal with sadness. The
feeling of loss I have or the disappointment I receive from a situation. At the
end of the day, we move on from that feeling. We find a way to take to move on,
however if we don't it leads to major consequences such as depression.
Depression is more than what you think. It is more hidden, and we must discover
ourselves of what our brains are capable of and what we can do to prevent
it.
The 2 most common types of depression
Major Depression
The one everyone heard of. When
you constantly fill a balloon with water, at some point the balloon is going to
burst. When we bottle our emotions, it's all going to come crashing down one
day. These long periods of unhappiness may be the reason. It could be because
constantly your stressed, or your too self-critical to the point your
self-esteem is shattered. As a result, you lose the energy to do anything, and
your patterns of food and sleeping has no consistency. Suicidal thoughts
constantly pop in and out of your head while anxiety lurks at the back of your
head. This effects the way you think, how you perceive things and your ability
to do anything in a negative way.
Bipolar Depression
The one not many people heard
off. You’re in luck then! It is in the name. You go through episodes of
moderate depression then after you go through periods of high energy. With the
inconsistent pattern leads to a cruel amount of stress. This can be caused by
life changing events, stress, or sentimental things. All of this leads to major
changes in our unique brain. Our unique system that can create the problem can
also solve it.
How can split open such a
discreet matter? The matter was created within us, so it is up to us to solve
it. Sadness is a sensitive emotion that leads to frustration. With more
emotions involved, it becomes harder to solve so we must be aware of this
issue.
Firstly we must be aware of how
we are feeling, then it allows us to overcome it. Then it's time to get away
from the problem and do things that boost yourself such as going outside to get
fresh air or reading a book- anything you like! With you separating yourself,
you can rediscover yourself and then think of solutions on how to do it.
Remember, your part of the ride, there will always be ups and downs
We can tick of covering the two
main emotions of the list. Let's go over a topic where we can be guilty of
being part of but often don't realise it. It is a topic where this isn't only
about us, it involves society and the people around us. The key themes of
sadness and anger can bring us into Conformity.
Conformity
It is type of Social
Influence. It is changing your behaviour to go along with the people in
a group, even if you don't agree with them. There are three
types.
How and why does this happen?
Many variables can cause but we
are going to look at the two main emotional variables: Anger and Sadness. For
example, you may want to fit into a group because your angry you don't fit in a
group or sad that that your being judged of having a unique view compared to
everyone else. An influence of a group majority influences your judgment and
thinking. In simple terms- following the herd. Following the herd is a fickle
matter, it can be beneficial as more brains are involved in the thinking,
however you can lose yourself, your identity and own thought process in the
activity.
Internalisation
The truest and strongest form of
conformity. When you accept belief or behaviour
both publicly and privately. It is a slow and unnoticed
process and has long term effects. This type is when you lose your identity,
because now your own thoughts and opinions aren't yours, it is only what
majority of people are saying. Examples are Religion. You are surrounded with
people that follows a certain religion and gradually you may start to 'see
things their way'.
Compliance
When you go along with a public
request or behaviour while disagreeing in private. We do this because we want public
acceptance, we don't want to be the one that is left out. Examples are when a
friend may ask you to do something and that could be for you to do something
you don't want to do but it may make you look cool, professional etc...
eventhough you don't want to do that favour they are asking. Once we start
doing this, we are trapped in that endless cycle for public acceptance.
Identification
When you conform to the demands
of a social role in society. This sounds wordy. Identification is when you
follow a social norm of a particular role you have in society. This is
temporary. For example this can be Army behaviour. We expect soldiers to be
highly maintained, strict with themselves and people who doesn't play around.
Soldiers would want to change from their day-to-day personality to an 'Army'
one to fit in their group.
We all know that society plays a
huge part in our lives. The way we perceive the world, the way we think about
people and how we tackle situations. Surrounding yourself with the right people
shapes how you are. We are humanity that depends on other people for survival.
We live in a fast-moving world powered by technology that increases our
life-expectancy. The people we surround our self with, their purpose isn't
about ensuring our survival, but it is about how they can add value to our
lives and how they can positively influence it, because social influence isn't
a terrible thing, it is about either it will give us a positive value to our
lives or a negative one.
